2023 WWE Royal Rumble Analysis and Predictions

January 28, 2023 by Leave a Comment
Cody Rhodes returns to the WWE in the Royal Rumble after suffering a gruesome injury while training for Hell In a Cell

Welcome to the most unique WrestleMania season we have ever known. As far as we know, Triple H is entirely in charge of the WWE creative product and for the first time in the history of WrestleMania, Vince McMahon is not. I say as far as we know because McMahon weaseled his way back into the WWE board of directors after having had to retire in disgrace because he is a lecherous old man. Ostensibly, his role as chairman of the board is not the same as his hands-on role as CEO and he is just there to re-negotiate the television rights and possibly sell the company.

Wrestling fans and critics largely are hoping McMahon does not return to WWE creative as he had become increasingly erratic with his decisions regarding talents and the on-screen product, and he was severely out of touch with his audience. Triple H has taken things in a much different direction. He brought back fan-favorite talents that McMahon abruptly fired. The NXT callups to the main roster were given a chance to get over on television without being instantly buried. He even gave two-named wrestlers turned one-name wrestlers their first (or last) names back!

The product is far from perfect, but it has been noticeably more enjoyable with Triple H at the creative helm. But the pressure is going to be on for him to deliver at WrestleMania, and that will only be a success if things get off to a good start at the Royal Rumble. There are only five matches on the card and two of them are inconsequential women’s matches, but there is still a lot to unpack here.

Bray Wyatt vs. LA Knight in a Mountain Dew Pitch Black Match

It is good to see Bray Wyatt back in the WWE after he was unceremoniously fired from the company following WrestleMania 37. However it is somewhat incongruous for his supernatural character to be featured in a match sponsored by Mountain Dew. It remains to be seen (or not, I guess) what a Pitch Black Match looks like, but if this progresses Wyatt’s character headed into WrestleMania, it will be worth the icky corporate tie-in.

Prediction: Winner, Bray Wyatt

Roman Reigns (c) (with Paul Heyman) vs. Kevin Owens in a singles match for the Undisputed WWE Universal Championship

Roman Reigns may be the face of the WWE, but it is Kevin Owens that keeps the company running. There is no more important opponent for the main-event level talent in today’s WWE than Kevin Owens. This is his second high-profile match in the last twelve months, having experienced his career peak with a main event match against Stone Cold Steve Austin at WrestleMania 38. Owens can work with anybody in any type of match and can come off as a credible opponent.

The tie-in with Sami Zayn is critical to this angle. Zayn has never been more popular than he is right now. The crowds at live shows are enamored with him and his compelling storyline with The Bloodline. His tenuous status with the Tribal Chief and his cohorts changes from show to show, and the twists and turns in their relationship always leave us wanting more. There will certainly be a twist to this match that propels Sami towards a high-profile clash at WrestleMania 39.

Prediction: Winner and still Undisputed WWE Universal Champion: Roman Reigns

Women’s Royal Rumble Match

There is virtually no build up to the Women’s Royal Rumble Match as evidenced by the fact following the go home episode of Smackdown, there were only a total of twelve entrants announced. One of them is Emma (insert face palm emoji here). The only one that has doing anything of note right now is Rhea Ripley.

Ripley is the centerpiece of the only interesting storyline involving any of the female talent on the WWE main roster right now. The Judgement Day is a serviceable faction, and she is their most visible member.

Prediction: After countless blown spots and anti-climactic surprise returns, your winner will be Rhea Ripley.

Bianca Belair (c) vs. Alexa Bliss in a singles match for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship

Alexa Bliss is in the longest yo-yo of a career arc we have ever seen. She was aligned with Bray Wyatt until his firing from the company, and the unwind of her supernatural character was pretty much wrapped up when he was rehired. So, it appears that she is headed back to be part of a faction with him. Other than that possibility, there’s nothing to see here.

Prediction: Winner and still champion, Bianca Belair

Men’s Royal Rumble Match

The return of Cody Rhodes from a gruesome torn pectoral injury has been the talk of the rumble. There has been criticism levied at the announcement of his return instead of making it a surprise. But this was obviously going to happen for quite some time, so it made sense to build up his return.

There are still at least ten entrants that have not been announced yet so there is room for legitimate surprise entries into the rumble. Edge seems like the most logical one because it is time for him to return to gear up for his WrestleMania program. After that you can let your imagination run wild. It could be a few NXT callups, a returning Hall-of-Famer who gets tossed in thirty seconds, or maybe The Rock?

I would guess that the winner is in the pool of entrants that were already announced. I have them bucketed as follows:

No Chance in Hell:

Kofi Kingston, Santos Escobar, Ricochet, Baron Corbin, Omos, Karrion Kross, Dominik Mysterio, Xavier Woods, Braun Strowman

Dark Horse Winner Potential:

Edge, Austin Theory, Rey Mysterio, Gunther, Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, The Miz

High Probability of Winning:

Seth “Freakin” Rollins, Bobby Lashley

Odds-On Favorites:

Brock Lesnar, Cody Rhodes

In reality, the condition that the winner of the Royal Rumble goes on to face the champion at WrestleMania is a creative trap that limits the pool of potential winners to a select few. But WrestleMania is two nights long now so there is potential for multiple angles to be set up from the outcome here.

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WrestleMania 38: Where Less is No Longer More

March 28, 2022 by 2 Comments

As an aficionado of the Jim Ross podcast, I’ve often heard him use the phrase “less is more” as a bit of advice he would give in-ring talents for how to construct the flow of their matches. Well, that phrase does not apply to the big picture in the WWE. For the third year in a row, WrestleMania is a two-night affair. The previous two double-WrestleMania’s appeared to be necessitated by the pandemic. Unfortunately, that trend appears to be permanent.

Were any fans really clamoring for a two-night WrestleMania? I did not even like the trend of the show getting longer and longer every year to begin with. Like the rest of the world, my attention span gets shorter and shorter all the time. I would be fine with a three-and-a-half-hour card featuring the best full-time talents on the show that save their best efforts for the Grandest Stage of Them All.

The WWE business model is about grabbing new revenue opportunities at every turn. It is like the Star Wars Effect where a conglomerate super-sizes content such that creativity suffers greatly, but it makes a lot more money, so the creators really do not care about the quality of their product. Case in point: Two superstars who were prominently featured at WrestleMania 37, Braun Strowman and Bray Wyatt, have since been fired due to “budget cuts”, but now the WWE paradoxically must fill two shows without them. The WWE gets to earn more money while spending less on in-ring talent.

At the time of this writing, there are fourteen matches announced in total for the weekend, and an appearance of Stone Cold Steve Austin on the KO Show. The cards are watered down and bloated even in isolation. The only match that seems like a big deal is the Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar title unification showdown. Maybe that is because this is the third time these two will face each other in a WrestleMania main event.

Everything else that has been announced does not move the needle. A handful of celebrities that I do not care about, and a bunch of matches that look like they belong on Raw or Smackdown.

But hey, it is still WrestleMania weekend. Even if it sounds like a chore to sit through both shows, that is what I am going to do! Maybe Edge and AJ Styles have big plans for their match. Maybe Seth Rollins brings his A game to his mystery opponent. Maybe Johnny Knoxville finally breaks every bone in his body on live television and I can say I saw it. And if I get tired or bored, I can take a nap during one of the women’s matches!

Keep an out for my expert predictions and analysis later in the week. I sure have a lot of typing to do!

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WrestleMania 37 Postscript

April 12, 2021 by Leave a Comment
What was up with Alexa Bliss at WrestleMania?

The WWE delivered in a big way over the two-night showing of WrestleMania 37. It was dealt a tough hand with a storm in Tampa which forced a 40-minute rain delay at the beginning of Saturday’s show. Once the rains subsided enough for the show to start, the first live crowd the WWE has hosted in over a year was clearly excited for action.

Most critics tended to agree that both shows were exciting from start to finish and exceeded expectations. What makes that interesting is that this was more of a transitional WrestleMania than it may have appeared to be. Consider that this was the first time since WrestleMania XVI in 2000 that there was no involvement from The Undertaker or John Cena. Also consider that the WWE did not reach into the past to bring back a relic like Goldberg or a part-timer like Brock Lesnar to generate interest in the show. It mainly ran with the regular talent roster and one big outside celebrity. Maybe there is a lesson to be learned there.

I have been a constant critic of both Roman Reigns and the WWE Women’s division. Roman Reigns returned after an absence in 2020 to reinvent his character and put on a masterful performance in the main event of night two. Aside from the Women’s tag team matches that laid an egg both nights, even I must admit that Sacha Banks and Bianca Belair put on the match of their lives and that certainly bolstered the division.

There were some great moments along the way, along with some inconsistencies and some odd creative decisions. Out of it all emerged a clear list of winners and losers, with the winners far out numbering the losers.

Losers:

The Fiend: Here’s Bray Wyatt’s career arc: Gets built up, fans buy in, loses in a peculiar fashion, reinvents himself, repeat. That loss to Randy Orton did not help either competitor, the finish with Alexa Bliss made no sense at all.

Big E: Lost the Intercontinental Championship in his home city.

Mandy Rose: Through no fault of her own, she slipped on the wet ramp during her ring entrance. This will haunt her on the Internet for the rest of her life.

Bayley: Her championship run in 2020 was not enough to earn her an actual match at WrestleMania 37. Instead, she was stuck with a comedy bit that did not work and got tossed aside by the Bella Twins. The crowd had the wrong reaction to the episode anyway!

Hulk Hogan: Worked babyface, got booed. His magical aura is clearly a thing of the past.

Winners:

Bobby Lashley: Opened the show with a surprise win over Drew McIntyre. This was his biggest WrestleMania moment since “The Battle of The Billionaires”.

Cesaro: In his first ever singles match at WrestleMania, he picked up a signature win over Seth Rollins.

Omos: Looked like a killer in his debut. Hopefully he is always booked that way.

Shane McMahon: Even though it is entirely predictable that he is going to take an insane bump, he still makes it entertaining. His in-ring career is one car crash after the next.

Braun Strowman: Looked great in his match. He is a physical specimen that can cut a skilled promo and tell a story in the ring.

Bad Bunny: Far exceeded any expectations with his in-ring ability. Granted, the other guys helped make him look good, but he still carried himself like a pro.

Bianca Belair: Put on probably the best women’s match the WWE has ever seen in her WrestleMania debut. Hopefully, the rest of the division follows her lead and steps up their game.

Sheamus: Hit some great moves in his win over Riddle and walked out with a singles title.

Apollo Crews: It was a very round-about way to become a singles champion, but if becoming an ethnic heel is what it took, good for him.

Daniel Bryan and Edge: Both were forced to retire due to injury but ended up in the main event of WrestleMania anyway. The losses did not hurt them at all, they looked good in defeat.

Roman Reigns: Against all odds, turned his career around and is now the clear face of the WWE. Unlike in the past where he ruined every WrestleMania main event he was in, he turned in a commanding performance this time.

The WWE added WrestleMania branding to the Backlash pay per view for the first time ever. With any luck, they can continue some of the momentum they now have from a strong WrestleMania weekend into that show.

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WrestleMania 37 Night 2 Analysis and Predictions

April 11, 2021 by Leave a Comment

Two nights of WrestleMania? Best weekend ever? Or too much wrestling?

After watching last night’s card, I believe the WWE has fixed the “overcrowding” situation it used to have when WrestleMania was one night. There was only one over-booked match that was in place to get people on the card. Most of the matches were plain singles or tag team matches that were not rushed. While there were not too many surprises in the outcomes, most of them were very entertaining from start to finish.

Saturday’s show will be a tough act for Sunday’s show to follow. I think I would have been happy if last night was the entire WrestleMania card, but I am happy to watch again tonight. Here are my match predictions.

Riddle (c) vs. Sheamus in a Singles match for the WWE United States Championship

I have always been the kind of wrestling fan that found most of the babyfaces to be annoying. Riddle is my worst nightmare. I do not know what they are thinking with this guy. All I can hope for is that Sheamus shoves Riddle’s scooter down his own throat, and then kicks Riddle’s head into the 19th row.

Prediction: Winner and new WWE United States Champion, Sheamus

Asuka (c) vs. Rhea Ripley in a Singles match for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship

Rhea Ripley’s gimmick seems to be to show up from NXT just before WrestleMania and get herself a major brand title shot. Not sure why this keeps happening to her, she does not bring much to the table.  Asuka certainly does not bring anything to the table either. 

Prediction: This match is going to suck

The Fiend (with Alexa Bliss) vs. Randy Orton

Big E (c) vs. Apollo Crews Nigerian Drum Fight for the WWE Intercontinental Championship

This is a head-scratching development. These guys were perfectly capable of carrying a babyface/heel feud centered over the Intercontinental Championship as they were. For some reason, Apollo Crews decided he was going to turn into an ethnic heel and develop a fake accent just a few weeks ago. There is nothing stranger than when a WWE Superstar gains or loses an accent, just ask Kofi Kingston.

Whatever a Nigerian Drum Match is supposed to be does not sound like it is WrestleMania-worthy. But these terrible creative decisions can not take away from the fact that these are two of the best wrestlers on the roster today. Hopefully, they can make chicken salad out of chicken scratch and turn in a memorable match.

Prediction: Winner and new WWE Intercontinental Champion, Apollo Crews

Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn (with Logan Paul)

Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn are trying to challenge Randy Orton and John Cena for the longest feud ever. These guys know each other well and are both performing at a high level right now. They are going to have to get Logan Paul involved in the match somehow, hopefully in a way that does not interfere with the story the two professionals are trying to tell.

Prediction: Winner, Sami Zayn

Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler (c) (with Reginald) vs. Tag Team Turmoil winners in a Tag team match for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship

The makeshift team of Natalya and Tamina was the puzzling choice to win Saturday night’s race-to-the-bottom turmoil match to earn a shot at the Women’s Tag Team Championship on Sunday. With any luck the title match is better, but I would not count on it.

Prediction: This match is going to suck

The Fiend (with Alexa Bliss) vs. Randy Orton

Randy Orton and Bray Wyatt are at it again at WrestleMania and hopefully this time their match is better than the aborted mess that was their WrestleMania 33 match. The 2017 version of Bray Wyatt was floundering, and the special effects used in the match were anything other than scary. Now that Bray Wyatt is working as his “Fiend” alter-ego and his television exposure has been kept to a minimum, his work is stronger than ever. Given the involvement from Alexa Bliss and some creative camera work and special effects in the fan-less WWE Thunderdome, the build for this match has been one of the only standout storylines on WWE television right now.

Randy Orton is a versatile performer and seems to be in his element dealing with the supernatural aspect of Wyatt’s character. These guys are going to want to erase the memory of their first WrestleMania match and deliver a match to remember this time around.

Prediction: Winner, Randy Orton

Roman Reigns (c) (with Paul Heyman) vs. Edge vs. Daniel Bryan in a Triple Threat match for the WWE Universal Championship

For years I complained that Roman Reigns was a talentless disaster that ruined every single WrestleMania main event he was in. He was miscast as a babyface, his promos and catchphrases were cringe-worthy, and his in-ring psychology defied logic. Then he disappeared the week before WrestleMania 36, forfeiting his spot in a championship match with Goldberg and stayed off WWE television for months.

Then something strange happened. Reigns pivoted into a heel and finally became a talent worth taking an interest in. His brooding mannerisms are much more suited towards being the arrogant “Head of the Table” than whatever the “Big Dog” was supposed to be.

While it is a feel-good story that Edge was able to return to the ring after being forced into retirement due to a neck injury, his reemergence has been a complete debacle. His WrestleMania 36 match with Randy Orton was among the worst on the card, a thirty-minute exercise in how many times they could hit each other over the head with a heavy object. Not much longer after that, Edge was lost to injury in a development that surprised nobody. While he was able to win the Royal Rumble and secure a title match at WrestleMania, it seemed like the match was lacking something big.

Cue everyone’s favorite underdog, Daniel Bryan. Bryan was the main event winner that WWE management did not even want on the card at WrestleMania XXX. After being forced into early retirement himself and making a miracle comeback, Bryan is now being asked to spring into action to spice up the action for the main event of WrestleMania 37. There has not been a career arc like this in WWE history!

For the first time in his career, Roman Reigns will be in a WrestleMania main event worth watching. Bryan knows his days are numbered and will look to make this a match to remember. This not only has match of the night potential, but it could also go down as a WrestleMania classic.

Prediction: Winner and new WWE Universal Champion, Daniel Bryan

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WrestleMania 36 Postscript

April 6, 2020 by Leave a Comment

Undertaker Boneyard Match

The most unusual WrestleMania ever featured an unforgettable Boneyard Match between The Undertaker and AJ Styles

Vince McMahon and the WWE managed to defy the odds and stage WrestleMania 36, despite overwhelming regulatory pressure across America to avoid unnecessary work and remain socially distant.  The die-hard fan in me says that WrestleMania is necessary and must go on at all costs.  But I’ll leave it up to my readers to decide if it was a wise decision to go ahead with it, given the potential risks to the performers, production staff, anybody they came in contact with, and society as a whole.

The WWE did the best they could under the circumstances, but it is nearly impossible to put on a credible professional wrestling show without a live audience in the stands to react to what they are seeing and hearing in the ring.  Two nights of fan-less WrestleMania started to fall a little flat by Sunday.

It was the most obvious during the final match of Sunday night between Brock Lesnar and Drew McIntire.  This was a championship match in a WrestleMania main event that was made up of almost all finishing moves and not much else.  Under normal circumstances, the fans would have popped for the finishers and each subsequent false finish, finally exploding when the emerging hero Drew McIntire finally got the pin and took home the gold.  But with silence in the building, the match came across as underwhelming and lacked excitement.  That exact same match in front of 80,000 fans would have appeared to be much different.

It wasn’t all a wash, there were some fun moments, and some interesting spots that wouldn’t have happened in front of a live crowd.  You could hear what the wrestlers and their entourage members were saying, like when Paul Heyman said to Lesnar: “He’s good, you have to hit him again!”  And the wrestlers were able to make creative use of the props in the WWE performance center.

If I had to grade the show overall, I’d give it a “B”, but I’d give Saturday night an “A” and Sunday night a “C”.  Saturday night was a bit more compact, and it featured a very good match between Kevin Owens and Seth Rollins.  And of course, the main event Boneyard Match between The Undertaker and AJ Styles stole the show and will go down as one of the best WrestleMania matches of all time.

Sunday was a big more lackluster overall, not just because of the lackluster main event.  It also featured another cinematic match between Bray Wyatt and John Cena which didn’t work as well as the Boneyard Match on Saturday.  In their Firefly Funhouse Match, there wasn’t much of a match at all, but a satirical and bizarre career retrospective of both individuals that ended without much wrestling or fighting at all.  I see what the WWE was trying to do there, but it just didn’t work all that well.

Sunday also featured the Last Man Standing match between Randy Orton and Edge.  The match went way too long, and in fact clocked in at the second longest WrestleMania match ever behind only the sixty-minute Iron Man match between Shawn Michaels and Brett “The Hitman” Hart at WrestleMania XII.  As Causal Geekery points out, Last Man Standing matches are a creative trap to being with, they are an exercise in very long false finishes which try your patience.  Which is more exciting, a kick out at two and 7/8ths, or someone who barely gets to his feet after an excessively long 9 count and then falls back down again?  These two should have had an emotional and exciting match, instead all they did was hit each other over the head repeatedly and found ways to get up until Edge brained Orton with a Con-Chair-To to put the match out of its misery.

Per the norm, WrestleMania had its share of winners and losers.  Some came out looking very good, others not so much.

Losers

  • Seth Rollins: Seth came into WrestleMania with an impressive 6-1 record, having recorded at least one victory in every WrestleMania he had competed in. Those aren’t exactly Undertaker-like stats, but they were nothing to sneeze at and something he could have used to build interest in future WrestleMania matches.  That angle is now dead.
  • Charlotte Flair: Now that she’s the NXT champion, does that mean she’s demoted from the main brands?  This never made any sense.
  • Brock Lesnar: He sure loses a lot of WrestleMania matches, doesn’t he? At what point does he lose his mystique as The Conqueror?
  • Goldberg: Why was he brought back again?
  • Bobby Lashley: Jobbing to Aelister Black has no upside.
  • Daniel Bryan: Lost a championship match in two straight WrestleMania’s. He needs to regain some momentum if he wants to finish his career out on top.
  • Dolph Ziggler: They finally put him on a WrestleMania card in a singles match, and he loses to Otis? And Otis gets the girl in the end?  Oh man, just put Ziggler out of his misery already!
  • Randy Orton and Edge: Had a chance to put on a much better match than they did. Nobody told these veterans that “less is more”?

Winners

  • Kevin Owens: Seth Rollins’ loss is KO’s gain. He finally had his WrestleMania moment and can build off this.
  • Becky Lynch: Her match sucked, but she has her own Mack Truck!
  • Drew McIntyre: His WrestleMania moment lost a little something with no fans to enjoy it, but he still closed out WrestleMania with a championship win over Brock Lesnar, his journey to the top of the WWE is finally complete.
  • Braun Strowman: Let’s hear it for the guy who couldn’t ever seem to get to the top!  After all these years in WWE, he won his first singles title in 2020, only to lose the Intercontinental Title very quickly.  He had to replace Roman Reigns in a championship match against Goldberg with no buildup, and just like that he had his WrestleMania moment and walked out with the WWE Universal Championship!
  • Sami Zayn: His middling career finally includes a singles championship match victory.
  • Otis: This is the unlikeliest WrestleMania booking of them all. For a guy who is a rookie and a tag team specialist to get a singles win at WrestleMania is nearly unheard of.  And he got the girl in the end, I guess I must admit that the guy has game!
  • AJ Styles and The Undertaker: All I can say about their match is “wow!”  It was a masterpiece of the rarely utilized “Cinematic Wrestling” artform.  The Undertaker has been justifiably criticized for hanging on for too long and putting on sub-par matches.  But the creative editing in this non-traditional match made him look like a million bucks.  AJ Styles was the perfect foil for this match.  The guy knows how to be a heel, he cheats, he talks smack, and he begs for forgiveness right before he gets pummeled by the babyface.  It was a movie and a wrestling clinic all in one, and it will be included in the list of greatest WrestleMania matches of all time.  And it began and ended with “Now That We’re Dead” by the greatest band in the world, Metallica!

Moving forward, it is very hard to say what will happen next.  Not because of the natural unpredictability of WWE storylines, but because the world is still in the throws of the COVID-19 crisis, and that directly impacts how and if the WWE can still generate content.  Now that WrestleMania is over, safety is paramount, and we can only hope that the world returns to normal sometime soon and we can get back to enjoying Raw and Smackdown and WWE pay-per-views in front of packed arenas again.  That would make the world seem normal again!

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WrestleMania 36 Analysis and Predictions

April 4, 2020 by Leave a Comment

WrestleMania splash

I hope you weren’t counting on Roman Regins to appear at this pandemic-influenced WrestleMania!

Amid a global pandemic that has shaken our reality to the core, WrestleMania weekend is here.  By all accounts, the entire show was recorded on several closed sets well in advance of the weekend.

Professional wrestling is impossible to be “socially distanced”.  Even a die-hard fan must wonder if the decision to go ahead with WrestleMania was a wise one, even with all the limitations that were placed on the event. Vince McMahon has a pretty shady past to begin with.  In 1983, he helped Jimmy Snuka beat criminal charges for the murder of Nancy Argentino. He proceeded to do business with Saudi Arabia in the face of overwhelming evidence that their royal family had a man tortured and killed.  You can almost hear him in a boardroom at WWE headquarters in Connecticut telling what’s left of his management team: “Dammit, I’m not going to let this coronavirus get in the way of what’s best for business, dammit!”  Whatever you think of Vince or decision, we now have two nights of WrestleMania to watch, and there isn’t much else to do!  Might as well tune in and try to enjoy it.

Against the backdrop of COVID-19, WrestleMania 36 had to be adapted radically, and it is going to look much different than what we are used to.  First off, as I mentioned, it had to be stretched into two nights to cover for the loss of the traditional surrounding events such at the WWE Hall of Fame ceremony and NXT Takeover.  Second, number of competitors in matches has been limited, likely due to social distancing measures.  Gone are the Battle Royals.  Third, there will be no special guest appearances by non-WWE talent like we’ve seen in the past.  No Joan Jett, Flo Rida, or Living Color to play superstar entrance themes.

But the most obvious difference of them all is that there won’t be any fans in attendance.  It is hard to imagine professional wrestling taking place in front of an empty arena.  It is a performance art that completely depends on fan reactions, and it feels empty and meaningless without a live audience to react what is said and done in the ring.  This is going to put extra pressure on the performers themselves to figure out how to entertain a television audience that they can’t see or hear.

The one interesting thread outside of the announced matches is the inclusion of Rob Gronkowski as WrestleMania host.  Gronkowski recently flamed out of the NFL because he was no longer able to perform at an elite level. The WWE saw something in him and signed him to a contract.  I’d presume the original intent of his WrestleMania involvement was to have him get involved in a match leading to his first feud in WWE as a wrestler.  Now he’s on double duty so we’ll see where it leads.

At the time of this writing, there are sixteen (!) matches planned across two nights.  Of course, this means that there are too many active competitors on the WWE main rosters, and there is no way to hold an audience captive for long enough to watch all of them.  I suggest using the women’s matches to get up and stretch.  You won’t miss much, and it will help you concentrate on the better matches.

On to the predictions!

Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins in a singles match

Who is better on WWE programming right now than Kevin Owens and Seth Rollins?  These guys could be in a professional wrestling textbook chapter about how to get a classic good guy versus bad guy feud over with the fans.

The “Monday Night Messiah” cuts one of the best promos in WWE right now.  And he sports an impressive WrestleMania record of 6-1.  His only loss occurred at WrestleMania 31, but he went on to score a win later that same night anyway.  Kevin Owens missed WrestleMania last year due to injury and does not have a signature WrestleMania moment in his career.  He’s going to look to change that this weekend against Rollins.  This match could steal the show, which ever night it’s on.

Prediction: Winner, Seth Rollins

The Street Profits (Angelo Dawkins and Montez Ford) (c) vs. Austin Theory and Angel Garza (with Zelina Vega) in a tag team match for the WWE Raw Tag Team Championship

This should be a decent filler match.  The Street Profits are hot right now, and Austin Theory, who was called up from NXT to replace the unavailable Andrade, are all motivated to put on a good WrestleMania match.

Prediction: Winners and new WWE Raw Tag Team Champions, Austin Theory and Angel Garza

Rhea Ripley (c) vs. Charlotte Flair in a singles match for the NXT Women’s Championship

After headlining WrestleMania 35 last year, Charlotte Flair finds herself in one of the biggest WrestleMania main event demotions since what happened to King Kong Bundy at WrestleMania III.  She’s competing for the minor league title against a fledgling competitor that isn’t ready for the Raw or Smackdown stage, let alone WrestleMania.

Prediction: This match is going to suck

Becky Lynch (c) vs. Shayna Baszler in a singles match for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship

See the notes about the Charlotte Flair match above, Becky is in the same boat.  It’s hard to understand why this happened to the women’s division year over year, but it probably has something to do with the fact that it is highly overrated and was not ready to headline WrestleMania 35 to begin with.

Prediction: This match is going to suck

Brock Lesnar (c) vs. Drew McIntyre in a singles match for the WWE Championship

Drew McIntyre is the feel-good story headed into WrestleMania.  His tale of being fired, re-dedicating himself, and making his way to the top of the WWE card has been told ad nauseum in the run up to this main event.  This may seem like an organic storyline, the underdog that the crowd supported because they recognized his talent and effort, who was rewarded by the WWE with a WrestleMania main event appearance.  But it really isn’t.

Brock Lesnar is the face of the WWE.  He is the special attraction that sells tickets and draws ratings when he appears sparingly on WWE events.  Drew McIntyre is nowhere near Lesnar’s league, and Lesnar is going to make very short work of him on his way to a big WrestleMania win.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Champion, Brock Lesnar

Goldberg (c) vs. Braun Strowman in a singles match for the WWE Universal Championship

Talk about COVID-19 wreaking havoc on the WrestleMania card.  First off, the WWE makes the ridiculous decision to have Goldberg come out of nowhere to squash The Fiend Bray Wyatt to set up a WrestleMania match between Goldberg and Roman Reigns.  Never mind that the WWE spent a year building up Wyatt to be an unstoppable force, only to completely undo the whole thing by having him completely job to Goldberg at a match in Saudi Arabia.  I guess they didn’t believe in Wyatt’s ability to sell tickets to WrestleMania, so they had to fall back to an ancient relic with better name recognition to fill that spot.

That match was designed to make Goldberg look strong headed into his WrestleMania main event against Reigns.  There was a brief in-person faceoff between Goldberg and Reigns to set up the feud.  But due to circumstances believed to be related to the COVID-19 pandemic, Reigns backed out of WrestleMania very late in the production cycle.  Therefore, the WWE was forced to substitute Braun Strowman in Reigns’ place with no time to build up any storyline whatsoever.  A situation like this is unprecedented in the WrestleMania era, no main event has ever been changed during WrestleMania weekend.

This is a bit of a curveball which makes the outcome of the match difficult to predict.  It’s hard to believe that the WWE would elevate Strowman to champion out of nowhere.  It’s also hard to believe that Goldberg is going to stick around for long as the champion when it appears that his job was simply to headline WrestleMania, hand the title to Reigns, and then fade away. It’s anyone’s guess, but I’ll make one anyway.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Universal Champion, Goldberg

John Cena vs. “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt in a Firefly Fun House match

Bray Wyatt was a lost cause in the WWE, having not lived up to his full potential.  The WWE pulled him off television, repackaged him as The Fiend, and a star was born.  He became WWE champion and appeared to be on his way to a WrestleMania main event when he was inexplicably destroyed by Goldberg and lost the strap.

Even more inexplicable than that, the next night instead of challenging Goldberg to a rematch, he challenged John Cena to a WrestleMania match.  This is a rematch of their WrestleMania XXX match that Cena won.  It was a creative misstep to have Cena beat Wyatt at that time, and that sent Wyatt into his spiral of almost always losing big matches.

With the character of The Fiend all but ruined after his loss to Goldberg, it’s hard to care very much about him.  But he is going to continue to be a full timer in the WWE while Cena will likely leave after WrestleMania to return to his acting career.  Logic seems to dictate that Wyatt will take this victory under those circumstances.

Nobody knows exactly what a Firefly Fun House match is, or how someone wins it.  To watch how that unfolds should be an interesting development.

Prediction: Winner, “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt

Bayley (c) vs. Lacey Evans vs. Naomi vs. Sasha Banks vs. Tamina in a Fatal 5-Way Elimination match for the WWE SmackDown Women’s Championship

This match should be outlawed.  Not because it violates social distancing standards, but because it looks terrible on paper, and will probably be even worse in practice.

Prediction: This match is going to suck.

Aleister Black vs. Bobby Lashley (with Lana) in a singles match

I have no idea where this match came from or why I should care.  Bobby Lashley was doing some cool things in his “love triangle” program between himself, Lana, and Rusev.  That program went away, Rusev is gone, and he’s now in a match that with the underwhelming Aleister Black, a guy with a cool entrance and not much else.

Prediction: Winner, Bobby Lashley

The Undertaker vs. AJ Styles in a Boneyard Match

After inexplicably being left off last year’s WrestleMania card, the greatest WrestleMania performer of all time is set to compete against veteran AJ Styles.  The Undertaker made a surprise appearance at WWE Super Showdown in February to win the prestigious Tuwaiq Mountain Trophy, and to set up the feud with Styles for WrestleMania.

The Undertaker dropped his “deadman” gimmick for this feud as Styles called him out by his real name and referenced his wife Michelle McCool.  Paradoxically, this is going to be a Boneyard Match, so you’d have to assume that The Undertaker is going to approach the situation with a hybrid “deadman” and “American Badass” persona.  This should be one of the best matches on the card.

Prediction: Winner, The Undertaker

The Kabuki Warriors (Asuka and Kairi Sane) (c) vs. Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross in a tag team match for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship

Four of the worst performers on the main roster.

Prediction: This match is going to suck

The Miz and John Morrison (c) vs. The New Day (Big E and Kofi Kingston) vs. The Usos in a Triple Threat Ladder match for the WWE SmackDown Tag Team Championship

It’s not WrestleMania without a ladder match, right?  These are two of the best tag teams in the game today, along with the Miz and Morrison.  It’s hard to understand why, when the talent roster is so stacked that the WWE brought back the highly overrated Morrison, but there are enough solid competitors in this match to carry him and make it entertaining.  Hard to imagine a ladder match without crowd reactions, though.

Prediction: Winners and new WWE Smackdown Champions, The Usos

Elias vs. King Corbin in a singles match

Corbin is coming off one of the best programs of his career with his long-running feud with Roman Reigns.  He’s among the best heels in the company right now and will be a formidable opponent for Elias.  Both guys always carry themselves as if they have something to prove, so expect them to go the extra mile to put on a great match.

Prediction: Winner, King Corbin

Edge vs. Randy Orton in a Last Man Standing match

After a nine-year absence from the WWE due to what was thought to be a career ending neck injury, Edge shocked the Houston crowd at the Royal Rumble with his surprise entry into the match.  At the time it was hard to imagine a better feel-good moment.  Well, the even better feel-good moment happened the very next night when Randy Orton attacked his former friend in the ring and attempted to re-break Edge’s neck!  And the best feel-good moment of them all was when Orton explained that he attacked Edge because he loved him and was for his own good!

As far as wrestling storylines go, it doesn’t get any better than this.  Randy Orton is cutting the best promos of his life right now and this is guaranteed to be an emotional, knock-down, drag-out brawl.  This match could stand as one of the main events, it has that kind of potential.

Prediction: Winner, Randy Orton

Sami Zayn (c) (with Cesaro and Shinsuke Nakamura) vs. Daniel Bryan (with Drew Gulak) in a singles match for the WWE Intercontinental Championship

There is a lot happening in this match.  It is a bit overbooked with all the extra faction members that are involved.  Zayn and Bryan are more than capable of carrying this match on their own.  I don’t get where Drew Gulak even came from or who he is.  It is an odd pairing that does nothing for Bryan.  Nakamura and Cesaro are well past their WWE peaks and are running out the clock on their contracts at this point without much to offer anymore.  I’m hoping the focus is just on Zayn and Bryan and they put on an entertaining match.  Bryan always saves his best for WrestleMania and I expect this year to be no different.

Prediction: Winner and new WWE Intercontinental Champion, Daniel Bryan

Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler (with Mandy Rose) in a Singles match

Otis being booked in a singles match at WrestleMania is as unlikely as it gets.  He is a tag team specialist and doesn’t have any memorable singles matches in the WWE at all.  But the WWE saw something in him when it created the soap opera-like angle with his ill-fated romance with Mandy Rose.  On the go-home Smackdown, a shadowy hacker revealed that Otis’ attempt at a date with Mandy Rose was sabotaged by a conspiracy between Sonya Deville and Dolph Ziggler.

This story is still being told, and its outcome is probably more interesting than the outcome of the match itself.  The real prize isn’t winning the match, it’s Mandy Rose herself.  One must hope that the outcome is for Dolph Ziggler to get her in the end, proving once and for all that nice guys finish last and chicks dig bad guys! Ziggler is a perennial under-achiever, this is a good opportunity for him to shine.

Prediction: Winner, Dolph Ziggler

That’s a lot of wrestling for two nights!  Even a pre-produced and crowd-less WrestleMania is still going to be the best of the WWE.  Enjoy the show and let me know what you think!

Filed Under: WWE Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Royal Rumble Analysis and Predictions

January 25, 2020 by Leave a Comment

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The best time of the year to be a professional wrestling fan is WrestleMania season.  The Road to WrestleMania 36 begins this weekend with the Royal Rumble, so it’s time to get excited.

Fans of WWE are outright inundated with content these days between Raw, Smackdown, NXT, monthly pay-per-views, and other WWE Network original programming.  There’s barely time to keep up with it all.  Given there is that much airtime to fill, there was a lot of mediocre storylines and matches on WWE TV in the second half of 2019.  But coming into the Royal Rumble, a lot of wrestlers and their story arcs are heating up at the right time, and this has a chance to be a memorable pay-per-view.  Let’s get right to the predictions:

Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin in a Falls Count Anywhere match

King Corbin is among the best heels on the WWE roster today.  WWE fans boo him at every turn, and that has made him the perfect mark to keep them from booing Roman Reigns.  Their feud has been long running, but it has remained interesting because of the continued layering of the story with antagonists Robert Roode and Dolph Ziggler joining the fray, along with protagonists The Usos.  Both competitors in this match will also compete in the Royal Rumble, so expect the aftermath of this bout to carry on for the rest of the night.  The falls count anywhere stipulation should lend it self to some interesting spots in the cavernous Minute Maid Park in Houston.

Prediction: Winner, King Corbin

Shorty G vs. Sheamus

This is a filler match on the card, but it gives both men who didn’t have a chance to win the rumble itself to put on a showcase.  Sheamus is back after a long layoff, and Shorty G is still trying to distinguish himself from the plethora of mid-card talent on the roster.  If G plays his cards right, he can be the next Daniel Bryan underdog-type runaway hit.

Prediction: Winner, Sheamus

Andrade (c) vs. Humberto Carrillo in a singles match for the WWE United States Championship

This is a hot-shot angle match based on this week’s encounter between Andrade and Humberto Carillo on Raw.  Carillo is as cold as ice right now, and this is a directionless feud between the two.  Andrade has showed some promise as a mid-level heel as of late, so he’ll need the win here to continue his momentum.

Prediction: Winner and still United States Champion, Andrade

Becky Lynch (c) vs. Asuka in a singles match for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship

The WWE women’s Division was hot enough early in 2019 to carry it to main event status at WrestleMania.  In hindsight, it was the special attraction of Ronda Rousey that made the all the difference.  Since her abrupt departure after WrestleMania 35, the women’s division is boring and drab.  This match won’t have much consequence in the grand scheme of things.

Prediction: This match will suck

Bayley (c) vs. Lacey Evans in a singles match for the WWE SmackDown Women’s Championship

My comments about the Becky Lynch match go double for this one.  At least Bayley turned heel and changed up her look, man was she annoying as a babyface.

Prediction: This match will suck

“The Fiend” Bray Wyatt (c) vs. Daniel Bryan in a Strap Match for the WWE Universal Championship

Two of the very best in the business today go head-to-head in a strap match.  This should be a clinic in storytelling in wrestling.  “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt is amid a career renaissance since his re-packaging as a multi-personality villain with both his twisted children’s host and horror movie-inspired fiend characters.  He’s finally operating at a level commiserate with his talents and carries the WWE Universal Championship as his reward.

Daniel Bryan regrettably turned babyface in order to feud with Wyatt.  He has done all of his best work in WWE as a maniacal heel and helped carry the match of the year in 2019 against Kofi Kingston at WrestleMania 35 in that capacity.  Even still, he’s one of the best wrestlers on the WWE roster right now and expect him to shine in this match.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Universal Champion, “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt

Women’s Royal Rumble Match for a world championship match at WrestleMania 36

At the time of this writing, 24 hours before the Rumble starts, there are only nine women announced for this thirty-woman contest.  That should tell you how many women on the roster right now are even relevant.

Prediction: Extended bathroom and beer break for the live audience in Houston

Men’s Royal Rumble Match for a world championship match at WrestleMania 36

There is a lot to unpack in this match given the complex storylines headed into the rumble match, along with the countless possibilities for how it can go down. This match isn’t just about who wins, it’s going to also set in motion a bunch of angles that will lead to WrestleMania 36.

The winner gets a shot at the title of his choosing at WrestleMania 36, but the wrinkle to that story is that Brock Lesnar volunteered to join the match as the #1 entrant, and he is already carrying a WWE championship. It is unknown what impact that would have on WrestleMania if he were to win.

For the first time in many years, there are a host of hot babyfaces on the show right now that have transitioned from being heels but maintained their edge.  Kevin Owens and Samoa Joe fit that description.  A lot of competitors in the picture have interesting storylines on Raw and Smackdown as of late, especially Erick Rowan, Rey Mysterio, Dolph Ziggler, Rusev, Bobby Lashley, Aleister Black, Buddy Murphy, Seth Rollins, and The Miz.

Twenty seven of the thirty competitors have been announced so far for the match, none of them from NXT.  This leaves room for an “alumni” or an NXT up-and-comer such as Keith Lee to make a surprise appearance.

Given all that, I’ll split it into three categories of potential winners and losers.

No Chance in Hell:

  • Rey Mysterio
  • Ricochet
  • Elias
  • Dolph Ziggler
  • Otis
  • Tucker
  • Rusev
  • Bobby Lashley
  • Aleister Black
  • Buddy Murphy
  • Shinsuke Nakamura
  • Kofi Kingston
  • Big E
  • R-Truth
  • John Morrison
  • The Miz

Don’t Count ‘em Out:

  • AJ Styles
  • Randy Orton
  • Drew McIntyre
  • King Corbin
  • Kevin Owens
  • Samoa Joe

Odds-on Favorites:

  • Roman Reigns
  • Brock Lesnar
  • Braun Strowman
  • Seth Rollins

I’ll go ahead and pick one, based on my theory that the disruption it would cause if he were to win would cause a ratings spike on the next Monday Night Raw.

Prediction: Winner, Brock Lesnar

Filed Under: WWE Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

WWE WrestleMania 34 Analysis and Predictions

April 7, 2018 by 1 Comment

 

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It’s the best time of year to be a WWE fan!  No weekend out of the year is better than WrestleMania weekend!  WrestleMania 34 in New Orleans will have a stacked card from start to almost the finish!  Roman Reigns is set to ruin a fourth straight WrestleMania main event, but even the lack of suspense surrounding the outcome of his match won’t dampen my enthusiasm for the card.

In fact, there is enough mystery baked into this card to keep us guessing for most of the night.  In addition to there not being too many obvious winners on the card, there are a lot of questions that we don’t have answers for right now:

  • What is this “performance” that Elias has promised us going to entail?
  • What’s up with John Cena calling out The Undertaker to no avail? Is Cena really not going to have a match?  Would they have an unadvertised Cena/Undertaker match on the card?  Is something else going to happen?
  • Who is Braun Strowman’s TBD tag team partner? Or is he not going to have one and use some sort of reverse Feebird Rule to win the tag title himself?
  • Is this Brock Lesnar’s last match before returning to the UFC?
  • What happened to Bray Wyatt in the Lake of Reincarnation at the Hardy Estate two weeks ago? Is he going to make a surprise return with a new persona?
  • Is there going to be a heel turn we don’t see coming?
  • Is a WWE alumnus going to make his return? Will an NXT call up have an impact on the card?  Will someone from NJPW crash the show?

The WWE is at its best when it can actually keep storylines secret and you don’t have any idea what is going to happen.  It makes the show all the more enjoyable to sit back and watch.  I expect that this could be one of the best WrestleMania’s we’ve seen in the past 10 years, and we could be treated to at least one or more top-10-all-time best WrestleMania matches.

On to my expert predictions.

AJ Styles (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura in a Singles match for the WWE Championship

It’s hard to believe how far Shinsuke Nakamura has come in just one year on the Smackdown roster.  He showed up on the Smackdown following WrestleMania 33 with a violinist playing in his bizarre entrance.  He called himself the “King of Strong Style” and got the crowd to sing along with his entrance music in the following weeks.  He started to stand in the middle of the ring, do a squat, and scream “Come on!” at his opponents and the crowd ate it up.  Lastly, he came up with the catch phrase “Knee to Face” and that seemed to put him over the top.  I can’t figure out where the substance to any of this is, but the fans seem to really like it.

AJ Styles, conversely, is one of the top performers in the company right now, both on the microphone and in the ring.  His in-ring work is unparalleled on the WWE main roster right now and that has earned him the fans respect.  He reminds many of a master wrestling technician who can also sell and tell a story, like a young Shawn Michaels.  Even in his early 40’s, he’s the subject of anybody’s dream match right now.

The build for this match has been lackluster.  Anytime you have a big babyface vs. babyface match, the angle is a bit of a creative trap. They have to protect both guys image, and nobody can generate any real heat.  They have to pretend like there is a mutual respect for each other, and that is a very uninteresting way to promote a match.  Either way, when they get to the ring they should deliver.

There’s a lot on the line in this match.  Styles gets his first opportunity to defend a championship at WrestleMania and Nakamura has never wrestled a bigger match in his life.  His Tokyo Dome experience from NJPW is the little league compared to having to perform on the Grandest Stage of Them All.  Both of these men, at this stage in their careers will want to make a statement in this match.  It has the potential to be the match of the night, and perhaps a top-10 greatest WrestleMania match of all time.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Champion, AJ Styles

The Miz (c) vs. Seth Rollins vs. Finn Bálor in a Triple Threat Match for the WWE Intercontinental Championship

The Miz has come a long way since his WrestleMania XXVIII main event against John Cena in which he successfully defended the World Championship.  In many ways, he’s a better wrestler now, and his reign as Intercontinental champion has been more impressive than his World Championship.  He is the best heel in the business and is considered by many to the WWE MVP.

Seth Rollins has lost a great deal of momentum since he lost the WWE Championship following an in-ring injury.  He was the feel-good story coming out of WrestleMania 31, when he stole the championship from Brock Lesnar in the main event with a surprise cash-in of his Money In The Bank contract.  Since the injury which cost him a spot at WrestleMania 32, he hasn’t had too many noteworthy moments.  He flip-flopped back and forth as a heel, he re-united The Shield, but that angle fizzled due to illness and injuries to the other two.  He had a slow-burn angle with Jason Jordan which came to a quick end when Jordan himself was injured.  Rollins needs his luck to turn around, and a big match at WrestleMania 34 would certainly do that.

Finn Bálor is a one-trick-pony.  He has a slick entrance with audience participation.  Other than that, he’s a scrawny little twerp who wears tights with a leather jacket.  He should be in the 205 division, wrestling guys his own size.  He doesn’t look right wrestling guys who outweigh him by 75 pounds.  He has zero personality to make up for his lack of size.  I don’t expect him do much of anything interesting in this match.

I’d prefer to see this as a two-man match, but this is better than the typical 5-man ladder match they usually put on for the IC title at WrestleMania, so I’ll take it.  Triple-threat matches are all about timing the big spots between the three competitors and are stylistically very difficult to pull off.  The Miz and Rollins are going to have to be at their best to pull this off and carry Bálor.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Intercontinental Champion, The Miz

Randy Orton (c) vs. Bobby Roode vs. Jinder Mahal vs. Rusev in a Fatal Four-Way Match for the WWE United States Championship

Not to be outdone by the triple threat match for the Intercontinental Championship, the United States Championship will be decided in a fatal four-way match.  A match like this will be either memorable for years because it was so good, or bowling shoe-ugly. Everybody will try to get a signature move in at some point in order to stand out.

Randy Orton continues to plod through the later stages of his career.  His championship win at WrestleMania was noteworthy because the crowd of over 70,000 was mostly silent throughout the match.  He’s going to need something better out of this year’s WrestleMania match.

Bobby Roode is the least interesting competitor in this match.  Over-produced entrance, an underwhelming personality, and way past his prime.  Nothing to see here.

Rusev snuck into this match because he suddenly has a popular catch phrase: “Rusev Day”!  It’s kind of weird but it works for him and should last for a little while longer.  I thought he was better as a monster heel, but I guess he’s selling more merchandise this way so good for him.

Jinder Mahal is the biggest home-grown star we’ve seen in years in WWE.  He’s had an amazing rebound from being fired from the WWE to his return and eventual ascension to WWE Champion.   He’s got a great look and played the part of the cliched ethnic heel to the best of his abilities.  If anybody deserves a WrestleMania moment and a win in this match, it’s Mahal.

Prediction: Winner and new WWE United States Champion, Jinder Mahal

Alexa Bliss (c) vs. Nia Jax in a singles match for the WWE Raw Women’s Championship

If you’ve ever followed this blog, you know what I’m about to say.

Prediction: This match will suck

The Usos (Jey and Jimmy Uso) (c) vs. The New Day (Big E, Kofi Kingston, and/or Xavier Woods) vs. The Bludgeon Brothers (Harper and Rowan) in a Triple threat tag team match for the WWE SmackDown Tag Team Championship

Big build up all around for this match.  The Usos finally get a match on the main WrestleMania card for the first time in their careers.  They’ve put in the time and they did a good job re-inventing themselves after their bland Hardy Boyz-ripoff gimmick they started off with.  This is a big opportunity for them.

The New Day is as stale as can be, and this team is dying to be broken up.  Big E will go straight to the top, Xavier Woods will go straight to the middle, and Kofi Kingston will go back to being a jobber.  They’ve had a fantastic run, but it is high time for a swerve and a heel turn for one of them, bringing this faction to an end.

The Bludgeon Brothers are hot right now.  Harper and Rowan (having just lost their first names!) are the two most underrated big men on the roster right now.  These guys have all the tools to be the best in this game.  Their outfits are a little over the top, but everything else about this team screams heel champions.  Their build to this spot was masterful, having them lay waste to a host of jobbers and making them look unstoppable.  Watch this space, these guys are going to be big.

Prediction: Winners and new WWE Smackdown Tag Team Champions, The Bludgeon Brothers

Cesaro and Sheamus (c) vs. Braun Strowman and TBD in a tag team match for the WWE Raw Tag Team Championship

How great is this?  The best tag team on Raw takes on the hottest talent on Raw, with a bone-fide mystery partner by his side!  This is WWE at it’s best, creating a ridiculous situation that we’re dying to see.  Could you imagine paying to see the Yankees play a home game against a mystery opponent?  Wouldn’t ever happen!  But in professional wrestling, this is creative gold!

People have argued that this isn’t the best spot for Braun Strowman and that he deserves to be in the main event.  I’m a huge fan of his, but I think this is a great spot for him.  Roman Reigns is the “chosen one” and there’s nothing we can do about it.  Strowman is still going to get his push, and he’s going to take the ball and run with it.  He does monster heel, he does comedy, he performs ridiculous feats of strength.  What’s not to love about the guy?  Just because he’s not in the main event, doesn’t mean he can’t be awesome.

Who is his partner?  I’ve read all kinds of speculation that it could be a returning hero, an NXT call up, or someone else already on the roster.  What’s the point in trying to figure it out now?  Just sit back and let the show come to you!

Cesaro and Sheamus always deliver.  They are going to nail their parts in this match and you can count on that.  When they lose the title, it will be fun to watch them chase it back down.

Prediction: Winners and new WWE Raw Tag Team Champions, Braun Stroman and TBD

Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Asuka Singles match for the WWE SmackDown Women’s Championship

Out of respect for Ric Flair, I won’t disrespect his daughter.  But this match is as good as it gets for women’s wrestling because the bar is set so low.  Asuka is average at best and her gimmick is annoying.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE SmackDown Women’s Champion, Charlotte Flair

Kurt Angle and Ronda Rousey vs. Triple H and Stephanie McMahon in a mixed tag team match

Kurt Angle made a hero’s return to the WWE last year at the WWE Hall Of Fame ceremony, and then re-joined the regular show as Raw General Manager.  Rumor had it there would be a big build to a WrestleMania 34 match for the Olympic gold medalist.  Instead, he got saddled with this abortion of a match.

Ronda Rousey left the UFC as a loser and a shell of her former badass self.  In the time between her UFC days and her WWE days, she did nothing to repair her reputation.  Thus far, she has completely bombed on the WWE stage.  Her promos are embarrassingly awkward.  As one of my readers pointed out to me “she had the personality of a wet blanket in UFC” and apparently, her ability to memorize and read lines the WWE creative team feeds her is zero.  Who even knows if she can wrestle?  Probably not very well.

I can’t feel too sorry for Triple H, he’s had some very good WrestleMania matches in his career.  But Kurt Angle deserved better than this.  I don’t think either one of them can save this mess.

Prediction: Winners, Triple H and Stephanie McMahon

Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn in a tag team match and if Owens and Zayn win, they will be rehired to SmackDown

Daniel Bryan’s surprise return to Smackdown changed the current landscape in the WWE in a way nobody saw coming.  He was close to the Shane McMahon rivalry with the Owens/Zayn duo for months, and he is perfectly positioned to return in this match.

Kevin Owens is the top heel on SmackDown, and the story arc of his simmering feud with Shane McMahon has taken on many Shakspearian twists since it began in 2017.  It’s now involved Sami Zayn, included the both of them sending McMahon to the hospital, and then getting themselves fired by Daniel Bryan before beating him up on the night he announced his return to active competition.  This was top heel work and WWE creative at its best.

This could be the most entertaining match of the night.  It has three of the best workers in the WWE right now, along with Sami Zayn who will play his supporting role as well.  It has “win” written all over it for Zayn and Owens, and it will be fun watching the aftermath on Smackdown when it’s all over.

Prediction: Winners, Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn

Brock Lesnar (c) (with Paul Heyman) vs. Roman Reigns in a singles match for the WWE Universal Championship

A fourth straight WrestleMania event is about to be ruined by Roman Reigns.  It’s a good thing this card is so stacked because the show will end with a thud with this match.  We’ve known for a year that Reigns is going go win the match.  The “like me because I’m a full-timer and Brock is a part-timer” angle is boring and has not helped Reigns improve one bit.  He still sucks on the mike and his in-ring psychology is poor.  No matter how many WrestleMania main events he gets, he never improves.

Brock Lesnar is about to walk out on the WWE.  His act has gotten tired and it will be good for the WWE to move on from him at the top. He had a great run since his return as a part-time special attraction, and something needs to be said about how less exposure can actually help a superstar in the WWE.  But it is time to go.

This match is going to fail to entertain.  The crowd will be tired, Lesnar will have his eye on the exit, and Reigns will continue to stink.  Try to stay awake if you can.

Prediction: Winner and new WWE Universal Champion, Roman Reigns

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Working the Shoot for WrestleMania Season

April 1, 2018 by Leave a Comment

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WWE fans like to think that we’re smarter than our predecessors from 30 years ago.  We think we know what is going on behind the scenes because we can read about backstage news online.  Now that kayfabe is dead, we know all the insider wrestling terms that the wrestlers give away on their podcasts.  We know what a “work” is and what “shoot” means.  We’d rather not cheer for the “babyface” or the “heel” based on their on-screen persona, we’d like to choose who we like and cheer or boo depending on how we think the WWE is using him.  We want to feel like we’re on the inside and we know what is going on.

Well, I have news for all of you.  We are, indeed, a bunch of “marks” during this WrestleMania season. The WWE is giving us all sorts of “reality” storylines and promos to make us think that the setup behind WrestleMania matches is based in reality.  In fact, nothing can be further from the case.  The WWE creative team is working us all on the way to WrestleMania, both with true-style angles, and completely over-the-top ridiculousness, and the fans are eating it all up!

Take a look at the yet-to-be-announced John Cena vs. Undertaker match. The Undertaker has yet to make an appearance during WrestleMania season at all.  But John Cena has been selling a story line that has brought him from Raw to Smackdown in a futile effort to have a match at WrestleMania, all the while hinting that he should wrestle The Undertaker.  Finally, he called out The Dead Man on Raw one night and pretended that “they would cut off his mic because they told him the match wouldn’t happen”.  Guess what?  Whoever “they” is, wrote every line he spoke that night.  It was a total work, and an extremely effective one.  What probably would have been a dull match is now very highly anticipated.

Contrast the Cena/Undertaker angle with the Cesaro and Sheamus vs. Braun Strowman and his yet-to-be-announced tag-team partner storyline.  How ridiculous is Braun Strowman?  He’s strong enough to pull down lighting rigs, flip ambulances, flip tractor trailers, and turn the entire Raw stage upside down.  Kurt Angle announced a tag-team Battle Royal to determine #1 contendership for the Raw Tag Team Championship at WrestleMania, and Brawn Strowman inserted himself into the match by shouting at the referee, and he proceeded to win it without a partner.  From a reality standpoint, this guy is totally ridiculous.  Yet Strowman is the hottest guy on the roster right now, getting more and more popular every day.  We love it!

How about Daniel Bryan?  Who saw that coming?  Out of nowhere, the guy we thought was forced into retirement as a result of brain damage, was medically cleared to wrestle.  He started off Smackdown the day the story broke with a heart-felt promo about how grateful he was that his family and fans supported him while he was in retirement and he was so happy to be back.  That was as real as it gets on the WWE microphone.  How does the show end?  By him taking a worked beating at the hands of Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens and leaving the arena on a stretcher.  Starting with a shoot and ending with a work, we got the best storyline on Smackdown all WrestleMania season!

Finally, there is the Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar WrestleMania rematch that pretty much nobody wants to see.  This match was rumored as far back as WrestleMania 33, so there wasn’t much suspense leading up to Reigns’ clinching of the spot at Elimination Chamber.  As usual, Roman Reigns can be counted on to be a boring dud on the microphone, and the WWE needed to find a new angle to use to sell this rerun of a match.  Somebody in WWE creative noticed that the WWE and UFC were both in Las Vegas on the same weekend, and that Brock Lesnar was photographed with Dana White on The Strip, while he didn’t attend the WWE show.  They got the brilliant idea to tell Brock to no-show Raw and have Roman Reigns cut a shoot-style promo saying that Reigns was abusing his part-time status by not showing up to Raw, and that we should take Roman’s side because he “shows up for work every day”.  As if that would somehow make him a good wrestler for a change.

At first, the wrestling rumor sites ate it up, and published stories that it appeared to be true that Lesnar really did no-show Raw due to some sort of altercation or disagreement with WWE brass.  The WWE faithful ate it up.  “How dare he disrespect us?  He really is like they say, he doesn’t care about the business he only cares about himself and money!  Screw him!!!”  Suddenly, Roman Reigns sounded somewhat interesting, not because he did anything noteworthy or good, but because people really started to hate Lesnar because he didn’t come to Raw.

The lines between reality and fantasy began to blur and crack the following week when Lesnar no-showed Raw again.  After the third week, it was apparent the storyline was a complete work when Lesnar no-showed for a third time.  The WWE took the unusual step of having the cameras follow Reigns into the “Gorilla Position” behind the entrance ramp curtain to confront Vince McMahon about the situation.  Doesn’t get any more “real” than that, right?

Well, none of the above was “real”.  The Lesnar storyline was a work.  All of it is a work.  We’re all marks and we are eating it up headed into WrestleMania 34.  In today’s wrestling landscape, the WWE has found a way to transform itself from “good guy vs. bad guy” to reality-based angles, and it is working very well right now.

It is the best time of the year to be a wrestling fan and I couldn’t be more excited for WrestleMania week.  Watch this space for expert analysis for all important WrestleMania matches and storylines.  I’m looking for your feedback, too, so stay in touch.

By the way, how cool was that Matt Hardy vs. Bray Wyatt Ultimate Deletion match on Raw two weeks ago?  Why don’t they do more stuff like that more often?  And what does it mean for WrestleMania?

Filed Under: WWE Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Royal Rumble Analysis and Predictions

January 28, 2018 by Leave a Comment

The road to WrestleMania 34 begins at the Royal Rumble in Philadelphia tonight.  At what should be the creative peak of the WWE year, both Smackdown and Raw are in the midst of a lull.  There is a lot of unwatchable content on WWE these days with the proliferation of the Women’s and Cruiserweight Divisions. You pretty much have to watch Raw and Smackdown on a DVR so you can fast-forward through all of that.  Not to mention, Roman Reigns is laying in wait to ruin yet another WrestleMania main event, so there isn’t much suspense right now in wondering who is going to get the big push in the coming months.

There are many bright spots in the middle card right now, and the Royal Rumble is always one of the more entertaining cards of the year.  So, there is plenty to look forward to this evening, of course with the exception of the Women’s Royal Rumble.  You should change the channel or take a nap or pet your dog or do anything else you can think of while this abomination is on.

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AJ Styles (c) vs. Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn in a Handicap match for the WWE Championship

AJ Styles has been a fan favorite since his first days in the WWE, having distinguished himself in every other major wrestling promotion in the world prior to his WWE debut.  His current run as WWE champion has been solid, and his momentum could carry him to WrestleMania 34 to defend his championship in the semi-main event.

Kevin Owens is the best heel on the Smackdown brand.  He is a relentless jerk, and never runs out of things to say to draw heat to himself.  Sami Zayn was spinning his wheels for his entire WWE run as a white-meat-babyface, and his fortunes turned around mightily when he turned heel by aligning himself with his former foe, Kevin Owens.  The two are a natural pairing, and they complement each other very well as annoying, cowardly heels.

The underpinning storyline behind this match is the budding feud between Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon that lead to the stipulation that this will be a handicap match for the WWE title.  Expect the Bryan/McMahon situation to explode somehow during this match, affecting the outcome.  I find it highly unlikely that they will award the WWE championship to two men using the Freebird Rule.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Champion, AJ Styles

Seth Rollins and Jason Jordan (c) vs. Cesaro and Sheamus in a Tag team match for the WWE Raw Tag Team Championship

The unlikely pairing of Kurt Angle’s “son”, Jason Jordan and Seth Rollins was made possible due to the unfortunate injury to Dean Amborse.  Jordan was put in an interesting spot with the illegitimate child angle (no pun intended), but not too many interesting moments came out of it until he paired with Rollins.  Now, they are a classic good guy/bad guy tag team, and play well off of each other.  Jordan has made the most of his role, and has gotten over as a heel.

Cesaro and Sheamus continue to impress as the best tag team in the WWE today.  Both were likely at the end of their WWE runs before they paired as a tag team, and they caught fire once they united.  They have great in-ring chemistry, and put on great matches on pay-per-views.

Prediction: Winner and new Tag Team Champions, Cesaro and Sheamus

The Usos (Jey and Jimmy Uso) (c) vs. Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin in a 2-out-of-3-falls match for the WWE SmackDown Tag Team Championship

The way these teams have been presented, I don’t know who is the babyface or heel team, nor do I understand why this has to be a 2-out-of-three falls match.  There isn’t much interesting going on here, and I expected better out of Shelton Benjamin since he returned to the WWE.

Prediction: Winners and still WWE Smackdown Tag Team Champions, The Usos

Brock Lesnar (c) (with Paul Heyman) vs. Braun Strowman vs. Kane in a Triple threat match for the WWE Universal Championship

No doubt about it, this is going to be the match of the night.  Braun Strowman is red hot right now, he has gotten over with the fans and has potential to carry the company if he plays his cards right.  He has freakish size and strength, in-ring ability, and is great on the mic.  The over-the-top displays of strength he shows by pulling down lighting rigs and flipping over semi-trucks are outright hilarious.  He has surpassed Roman Reigns in terms of ability, and hopefully WWE brass realizes that soon.

Kane is making a late-career main event run.  After having lost a considerable amount of time to injury, he made his way back into the top of the card.  Kane may seem like an odd pick for this match, but he has consistently been one of the most dependable performers in the WWE over the past 20 years, and will play an important part in this match.

Brock Lesnar is very consistent, if not somewhat stale.  Unlike Kane, not much changes with his character.  It might be time to change some things up if he’s going to stick to the WWE for an extended run.  I’d expect him to put on a great match like he always does.

Prediction: Winner and still WWE Universal Champion, Brock Lesnar

2018 Women’s Royal Rumble match for a women’s championship match at WrestleMania 34

This is a horrible idea.  It’s going to be the worst match of the year, and it’s going to go on way too long.  If you like watching people with pink and purple hair blow spots for an hour, you are in luck.  If you’re like me, there’s probably something better on TV at the time to watch instead.

Prediction: This match is going to suck and let’s hope it’s one and done and they never do it again!

2018 Men’s Royal Rumble match for a championship match at WrestleMania 34

The most unpredictable and unique match of the year will help shape one of the biggest matches on the WrestleMania card.  Interestingly enough, only 18 of the participants have been named thus far, with 12 remaining.  The mystery remains who the other 12 will be, but it is unlikely that the winner is among that group.  For the most part, the Royal Rumble only has a handful of people with a reasonable chance of winning and going on to a title match at WrestleMania.  There are a few categories that the competitors can be bucketed into.

No Chance in Hell:

  • Matt Hardy: The fans wanted his “Broken” gimmick from TNA. They got a “Woken” gimmick and it is terrible.
  • Rusev: Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Once a dependable heel, now he’s a babyface with a catchphrase. A funny catchphrase, but not ‘Mania-main-event-worthy.
  • Aiden English: Funny guy, will get tossed.
  • Apollo Crews: I watch WWE every week, I barely know who he is.
  • Titus O’Neil: Perennially underused, too old for a push to the top.
  • Tye Dillinger: Bad gimmick and very boring. Will never be WWE champ.
  • Big E: Has potential to be a top guy in the company, need to flip to heel and leave the New Day first.
  • Kofi Kingston: Is not going to WrestleMania in a singles match.
  • Xavier Woods: See Kofi Kingston

Could Shock the World:

  • Elias: Has done well with the opportunity he’s been given since his Raw call up.
  • Shinsuke Nakamura: The most perplexing guy on the roster today. What’s with that entrance he does?  What does “King of Strong Style” mean?  Why should I care about this guy?  Despite me not having the answers to these questions, people seem to like him, I don’t get it.
  • Finn Bálor: Another one that is “all entrance and nothing else”. Rumor has it that Vince McMahon thinks he is bland.  I wonder what took the old man so long to figure that out?
  • Baron Corbin: Seems to be hanging on to his push pretty well. A former André The Giant Battle Royal and Money in the Bank winner, he could surprise here.

Favorites to win:

  • Roman Reigns: Will headline WrestleMania whether he wins or not. Remains to be seen if they want him to get booed out of Philly for a second time after winning the Royal Rumble.  Sounds like a stubborn Vince McMahon move to me.
  • Randy Orton: Won last year’s rumble, had a horrific match at WrestleMania 33 against Bray Wyatt.
  • Bray Wyatt: Was in the same boat as Orton last year, maybe he gets to redeem himself this year.
  • The Miz: The best heel in WWE right now and former WrestleMania headliner. It could be his year.
  • John Cena: Needs one more championship to surpass Ric Flair’s career total. He’s part time now, so WrestleMania is as good a time as any.  Unless the rumors are true and he’s slated to work with The Undertaker this April.

Also, to consider would be some NXT callups making the match, and we might also see returning veterans who are no longer full-time wrestlers get involved.  Or maybe a leading independent wrestler, or someone tied to TNA or NJPW will make a surprise debut in the rumble.

Prediction: Winner, The MIz

A lot of things can happen in the Rumble match that set up other feuds or angles for the next two months headed into WrestleMania.  With a ruckus Philly crowd, the energy in the room should be good.  Despite the creative quagmire the WWE is in right now, this could turn out to be a great show, despite the Women’s Rumble!

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